Friday, September 28, 2007 / 2:06 PM
Another week swings right by
the usual bustle that soaks up all my time
More time i cry
More time i whine
Only for the unlimited datelines
Finally i can take a pause
a deep breath to full stop the week in sch
Finally a time out,
before the next meeting beckons me
to breathe and enjoy the silence
a rare treasure in schools truly
The horrors of the everyday sinks in
That i havent been thinking
i fire-fight alot
my lack of control in class
crippling my other incompetencies
I try to solve what i should already have prevented
And this BT is learning
To cope both the classroom and office
Comfortable in the classroom, efficient among the staff
but she keeps tripping, over little stones,
which holds her back gradually,
but retards her progress ever so subtely
When can she foresee these problems
when will her mind be tuned?
Sharpened to predict, and prevent
Honed to multi-task and be efficient
Like picking up steps in the dance studio
she'll get used to the pace and challenges
but in the studio, shez her own responsibility
and in school, she owes a dozen
classes that stream past
that comes through her little plush palms
faces who trust
and easily influenced minds
what can this BT do for them
its her constant struggle
and life doesnt revolve around them alone
her own dreams, worries and fears
her insecurities which hangs like a nook
which tightens each time she feels shez stepping into new grounds
at love or at play
she has to find that inner essence,
to sail her through her everyday
daunting, intimidating, welcoming or unfamiliar
she'll take her baby steps towards higher grounds
you can stumble, you can fall,
but you can't regress from the low you've come from.
Sunday, September 23, 2007 / 10:59 PM
and there you were, right next to me
but your heart could not have been further
that familiar smile had been wiped off
and distant was that handshake
in its place, a hug, replaced
It wasnt too long when we were best friends
when we shared secrets and dreams
where our lives were on common paths
but look what has become of us today
strangers, awkward and
between us stretched a thousand miles
though you were but a touch away
im sorry, for the unpleasant times
where we quarrelled and fought
where our ideas collided
where tears accounted to nothing,
no change, no improvement
and time which once drew us close
reversed its process
when once we were tight as sisters
today we're as loose as sand
the silence hit me like a pile of bricks
reality was worse den i imagined
friends can turn cold wen they give up
too quickly, our frenship saw an end.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007 / 11:16 PM
A fatter but happier me
that's what iv become
yes u can laugh and say, you look like a dump
but in my heart, alot more satisfies me
i see them more serious now
holding that attention that split second longer
sure they still kick and fool around
but amid the chatter is a mind that's learning to question
to doubt and process what im saying
and i thank them, thank god for them
but some are still lost
and its time for me to learn
to engage them more and interest them
to move away from those who affirm me of their knowledge
and turn my eyes and time to those who takes slower steps
since i was ever the same, lost in class, unable to cope.
this shall be my constant prayer
to work this confidence
to cook up better history recipes
to see how they learn better.
Ms Lin you're so boring!
i can see that screaming in their heads
so yes, no offence
its my turn to work hard and unlock ways to understd
once my work, now my kids
Monday, September 17, 2007 / 12:26 AM
A ktv wkend, then got some pampering at the salon on saturday....vvery happy cuz gt to spend time with berd peiling, bingz and pammie! havent seen dat gurl in ages!!!! oh gawddddd....bt glad dat all is well...its been a week since the holz, and i guess despite the rush, we are all coping in our own ways...well....looking plushie..eeeekss..need to lose it....the fats on the cheeks...
Thursday, September 13, 2007 / 10:54 AM
and because im learning...god has given me back the skip in my step....
Happier Ms Lin...Happier week...More effective lessons
keep it up! i make a mental note...
Guard my heart and stay energetic..
Tuesday, September 11, 2007 / 11:51 PM
"your best day is not behind you, but ahead of you" -Choikang Changmin Youngest fella in DBSKSuch words from the young boy...such luck for me to have friends who reminded me of it...how apt a time for me to run by this short but meaningful motto of his..yup...it has been a good day of preparing work for the week...and in good companyand yes, it'll get better...for my family, for my friends, for my dance, for my students and for me.
almost forgot about the blue skies and the cotteny cloudsalmost forgot my duties as a daughterto not let my parents worryMC today wasnt a bad ideawas reminded by Pop to reflect on my life and my thoughts about teachingHis msg reminded me that im still very lovedHis msg stirred up guilty pangs cuz i know i made them worrySorry daddie and mummie...so old le, still mking u worrie...The whole point of this career, of the teaching award was to put their minds at easeyet merely a year into service, i seemed to have lost the drive i used to havethe hopes i had as a teacher, of myself, of the kidsHoping to find it backthe happier, cheerier methe me with kind things to saythe teacher who didnt sigh so muchLaugh more, i make a mental noteSmile moreThink more like a child, and understand what the kids in class feel...il b better...i promise dadie..Gastric flu can plague mebut the blue skies and pretty weather will always keep me going
Monday, September 10, 2007 / 11:16 PM
the dancer in me is aching to dance to this song.
Could be lyrical hip hop, Jazz, modern..
Could be anything which the music makes my body move....
Let me indulge without the other thoughts in my head
Let me be in the studio all alone, where God alone watch
Even when i fall, i need not fear, fear the truth that im no longer the dancer i used to be
I miss the times where i was carefree
where i loved my life, every ounce of it
where i had enough joy in me to make people around me happy too
I miss the times i was held and safe, where my tears didnt simply drop onto the cold hard ground
I miss the energy and zest i possessed, at least i believed i did
Because now i see a weary me, only pinning for the days without school
I miss the times i smiled and meant every bit of it
where the smile matched the sparkle in my eyes
I miss my time in the studio
where i shone inside
where i believed that i was worth a second glance
I miss the times where i was happy most of the days
where happiness wasnt a rare luxury
where freedom and passion wasnt restricted to the studio
where i was me, be it at work or at school
now i barely recognize me
Can you tell me
How can one miss what she's never had
How could I reminisce when there is no past
How could I have memories of being happy with you boy
Could someone tell me how can this be
How could my mind pull up incidents
Recall dates and times that never happened
How could we celebrate a love that's to late
And how could I really mean the words I'm bout to say
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it's impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you
I cannot believe I let you go
Or what I should say I shoulda grabbed you up and never let you go
I shoulda went out with you
I shoulda made you my boo boy
Yes that's one time I shoulda broke the rules
I shoulda went on a date
Shoulda found a way to escape
Shoulda turned a almost into If it happend now its to0 late
How could I celebrate a love that wasn't real
And if it didn't happen why does my heart feel
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it's impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you
(sometimes I wanna rub ya, some nights I wanna hug ya)
And you seem to be the perfect one for me
You (some nights I wanna touch ya but tonight I wanna love ya)
You're all that I ever wanted
And you're my everything yes its true
Boy its hard to be close to you
My love
I know it may sound crazy
But I'm in love with you
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it's impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there (sometimes I wanna rub ya)
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce (but tonight I wanna love ya)
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said its impossible to miss when you never had
Never, never almost had you (but tonight I wanna love ya)
Sunday, September 09, 2007 / 2:39 AM
suntec dance...caught the hypes, saw the hips, skills and techniques which reminded me of how much harder i need to work in a few hours...caught glimpses of many familiar faces, and many whom i love...saw many who have given up their 9-5 to pursue dance as a career...i truly applaud them, and im feeling the familiar sense of disapptment with life and myself, repeatedly questioning myself: what m i doing? lifez gd to me, but i hvnt done my best, nor made the most outta it...what is Michelle becoming really? feeling that "neither here nor there" sense of loss
Friday, September 07, 2007 / 5:05 PM
TAURUS - The Enduring One
Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings who are stable and secure in their ways. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient & reliable. Make great friends & give good advice. Loving & kind. Loves hard. Passionate. Express themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous.
i want to be like dat...working hard...almost zoning at bucks
Wednesday, September 05, 2007 / 7:46 PM
Just sharing my good midweek with the world...MOS lunch *my favvvvveeeeee milk tea!* Arcade *Daytona with 14 yr olds who are better than me!!* Movie with good company *precious sister and students*
my monday morning day out with jenjen....the weather was perfect, sun and wind, perfect way to start the week....stretching it out like a little kitten....enjoying our cocktails...yummilicious
Monday, September 03, 2007 / 7:30 PM
Sunday, September 02, 2007 / 10:55 PM
A ktv wkend, then got some pampering at the salon on saturday....vvery happy cuz gt to spend time with berd peiling, bingz and pammie! havent seen dat gurl in ages!!!! oh gawddddd....bt glad dat all is well...its been a week since the holz, and i guess despite the rush, we are all coping in our own ways...well....looking plushie..eeeekss..need to lose it....the fats on the cheeks...
